Corruption
by Psianabel
Summary: They say Queen can hold herself in check every time, being in control of herself just fine. But there is something living inside her that knows that this is a lie, sampling the pleasures of her crumbling facade. (Type 0 Week Day 5, Somewhat between Rated T and M, Body Control, implied non-con and sexual assault, post traumatic events.)


A noise on the door brought Seven out of the deep thoughts she was in, the clouds in her mind gone when she placed a finger on the last word she read. Her head rose from the book lying in her lap and faced the door from where the harsh and sudden knock came from, quite unusual for this late time of the day.

"Yes?" she called out in a loud, curious voice, but received no answer.

For a while her gaze lingered, hoping to still get an answer to her ask. Just as she wanted to continue her study session, another bash against wood prevented from exactly doing that. Although the noise sounded mute and got drowned in the light chattering from the outside, Seven recognized the exact tone.

No one else knocked that polite.

Taking a deep breath she hurried from her bed, the book in her lap already forgotten and cast away from her mind. Instead she prepared herself for the next moments to come, because there couldn't be any other way than what she had in her mind.

Her speculation who asked for her got revealed the moment she reached for the doorknob and turned it around, the quite cooler air and smell from the hallway sweeping over her in a rush.

But that didn't surprise her, just like the person who stood in the door frame was no surprise to her, but _what_ she saw made her widen her eyes.

"Queen?"

As if time stood still Seven stared at the smaller girl, not missing the goosebumps and shivers all over her body. Her breath ragged and eyes too wild to catch, reddened from tears that refused to fall. Her cheeks puffy and glittering in the lamps of the hallway, something that Seven had never seen on her before.

And she had seen a lot in the time of war. Exhausted, haggard cadets that were too broke to function coming from their latest mission, scarred and agitated from the horrible things they saw out on the battlefield. Some huddled in corners and didn't want to speak for days, others tried to seek comfort in quiet company with fellow classmates.

Not everyone could cope with such sights as good as Class Zero, especially not if those cadets weren't trained – _made_ – for war.

But Class Zero was.

Raised as war machines any horrible thing they saw out on the battlefield didn't have much effect on them - even leaving behind their comrades were of no problem. As long as the mission came first, any sacrifice was sufficient. With that training they received they got numb to physical and emotional pain, ready to fight for whatever Mother tasked them to.

Never she had seen Queen in such an emotional weak state before, not since their childhood anyways. It had been years and her mind already had abandoned those memories of such a sights from her classmates. Seeing her like this again pinched deep in her heart.

Seven silently gasped when Queen almost fell in her arms, but she managed to keep her on her toes before she lost her composure completely. She grabbed her hand and lifted her up on her back, having her on wobbly legs again, steadier than before.

Still, Queen hadn't said anything. But words weren't important right now anyways, Seven observed enough with her own eyes to judge the current situation.

"Come on, let's sit down first."

With Queen in her arms, Seven kicked the door behind them close and carried her over to her bed where she just studied on. Like a wet sack of rice they fell down into soft cushions and Seven shifted until she found a good position for them, tucking a pillow under Queen's head as she decided to lay down instead.

"Is that okay?" Seven asked reassuringly.

Finally for the first time a reaction came from her, a single nod between the shivers that gnawed on her body. A sigh of relief left Seven at the answer, glad that at least her tiny help seemed to show positivity. Still, the whole situation was anything than positive, and until she didn't figure out what was going on, her concern was on high alert.

 _Something_ must have happened, something even Queen couldn't stand her ground on, otherwise her so-very upright and tight composure wouldn't crumble into a million pieces just like that.

 _Did something happened last mission?_ Seven let her thoughts wander as she simply watched Queen, sitting on the edge of the bed to give her the space she needed. She saw her taking deep breaths and just staring blankly at the ceiling, her fingers digging in the blanket she lied on.

 _She did came back yesterday. I haven't seen the reports yet, but … did she … again?_ Seven scratched her head. _But Mother would never let her-_

"Seven?"

"Huh?" Seven looked up at the mention of her name, widening her eyes in surprise. "What is it?"

"Thanks … for taking me in. I-"

"You know you can always come to me, you don't have to thank me." She shifted in her seat, taking note on how Queen's breathing seemed to slowly, but surely regain a normal pattern again, the deep breaths she took definitely helping. "... And I'm glad you did."

A silence occurred under Seven's watchful eyes, her eyes never leaving her. Though her state seemed to be better than a few minutes ago, it would still take a while until she recovered from what she experienced.

She always did. Seven might not have seen her in this post-mission state, but from the reports and telling from prior missions it was quite clear what it was.

She knew.

"Queen, do you want a cup of tea?" Seven murmured and took a glance to her desk. "I just brewed some for me and I won't be able to finish it on my own, though."

"Oh. … Yes, thank you." Her voice still creaked, but Seven could hear she tried to suppress it, letting her sound calm and polite like always.

Typical Queen.

Seven got the cup ready and sat down beside Queen again who in the meanwhile managed to lift herself up and leaned herself against the headboard. The company of Seven apparently did her good, the quiet calm aura radiating from her that embraced her, cuddled her while keeping a fine physical distance.

"Here." She held the steamy mug in front of her. "Green tea. You're favorite, wasn't it?"

"You remembered that?" Queen happily accepted the cup and soaked up the warmth through her hands. A sigh left her at the smell, the steam rising in her nose that tickled in a familiar manner, calming her senses even further. Her glasses began to fog, but with her gaze lost she didn't react on it.

Another quietness occurred while they both sipped on their tea. Again, Seven didn't take her eyes off her, taking note of every single movement she made, how her eyes kept focusing on the mug she held in her hands.

The thoughts kept bubbling, Seven could feel it.

"I don't … know why it happened."

"Hm?" Seven looked up from her cup, surprised how calm she could speak again. Queen didn't move and continued to stare. " … What happened?"

"This thing. I …"

Seven set down the mug on her nightstand, turning completely to Queen now. "Do you want to tell me?"

It took her a few seconds to form an answer, her wild mind still foggy. "I know you … will listen to me at least."

Seven nodded. "You can tell me, Queen."

* * *

It all started when I entered my room again.

I came back from a mission and woke up in Mother's office. She said I was out cold and I slept for a few hours, that I should be fine again. I trusted her words, of course. I always trust Mother.

But my body started to act strangely the moment I closed the door to my room behind me. A bubbling feeling, a turmoil that slowly crept its way through all over me, I felt it tingling from head to toe – an aching pain, like pinching needles that just barely scraped your skin, a fire under it you just want to rip off.

It didn't stop and neither I could stop shaking. My lungs became heavy, my throat tightened in a way I only knew from the endless fires and ashes on a mission. I tried to suppress it, like I always did, took deep breaths and tried to lie down on my bed -

But I didn't make it. I couldn't handle the immense _power_ that suddenly overwhelmed me. It felt alien and yet … and yet …

I fell down on my knees, my vision blurry and fading into gray. I had no idea what was going on, why this happened so sudden – I choked on my own air, I grabbed my throat out of instinct, but breathing only became harder and harder. I tried to scream, but my lungs gave in before I even had enough air for that.

That was where I knew I was helpless to … to _that_.

I know about … her. Or me, if you want to call that, too. I never remember anything about it, but I see the horrifying glances of the others when we meet after a mission, I read the reports, but they are alleviated. I tried to talk to Mother about it, but she never went into detail …

She sometimes appears when I die on the battlefield. When I'm gone, she takes over my body and finishes my duty … in her own way.

I cannot remember anything what she does, I do not know how many enemies she kills or how she fights, but I do know that she scares everyone around her.

Why she appeared now, I did not know. I should have been fine, like Mother said, but I was clearly not.

I could feel her. I could feel numbness spreading from the tips of my fingers and toes, my aching skin finally released from the burning fire that drowned me in a sea of flames. But it was more a curse than a blessing.

With the feeling gone from my limbs, I didn't have control anymore. I couldn't move my hands on my own, my legs gave in, they refused to work. I felt my heart racing, thumping more and more that my ears began to ring.

I was … I was _scared_. My consciousness was slipping away from my grasp, slowly and painfully – like if you are sitting in the back of your own head, watching your body move without your control. As if you're sitting on a chocobo and you're not the rider, your hands tied behind your back, and you can only watch where the chocobo is heading.

I tried to fight back, fight for my control again, the control I treasured for myself so much, the tiny grasp that was still left, but nothing worked.

Everything went so fast at this point.

I was pushed back inside my head. I saw how my body moved without my control, how I suddenly stood again on wobbly legs. My hands clenched and unclenched before my eyes, my lungs filled with air again – in the foggy vision I had left I could make out the dark aura surrounding my body and there I knew she … she took everything away.

I remember her voice, my voice, her words … a malice-ridden whisper over my shoulder. Even though the numbness almost spread up to my head, I could feel her voice boring daggers in my neck. Like a blade that scraped against the base of your skull, running over your cheek and down to your jaw.

 _Finally_ , she said. A laughter followed that was so _alien_ I didn't even realize it was my voice. She asked me how it feels like being still alive.

It was the point where I only felt _tiny_ and fragile, helpless. She knew I was still there, that I could see everything she did. Never in my life I was so … _frightened_. She had the power and could do everything with me, while I … I …

My fear was too great, the last remnant of myself was dangling on a fine silver string above a void I couldn't escape anymore. I wanted to scream, I wanted it to _stop_.

In the faint glimpses I could still make out I saw her walking over to my mirror. The lines were blurred, it was me from the outside. I still looked like myself … but it wasn't _me_.

She … She _smiled._ A toothy smile. She had the nerve to … smile at me and laugh at me how pathetic and weak I am, told me how my whole self is just a farce and how easy I am to control.

The last thing I remember from her was how she forced me to look in her eyes. She pushed herself against the mirror and stared deep in my soul – I expected to see the gray that I only saw in the vision I had left, but it wasn't the case.

My purple eyes turned red like a sea of blood, burning right in my soul and what was left of me. The eyes, blood, fire – everything spiraled in each other and let everything turn red, a sea of life that turned black the moment I blinked.

Everything went dark and what she did with me after that, I cannot remember.

I must have passed out, because I woke up in front of my mirror. I felt my limbs again, but they were too sore to move. My … My jacket was torn open and from my weak attempts to move I felt scratches over my stomach and thighs. … They did not bleed or hurt, Mother's magic must have been set in motion already, and yet –

I started to shake again, I couldn't imagine what she did to me. Where did these wounds come from and how did she … hurt me?

Her words … they still ring in my ears. I can hear them even now, how they burned down my neck. I can still see her staring at me, with her bloody red eyes.

I'm afraid, Seven, I'm afraid she appears again out of nowhere … that I lose my control over myself again.

I don't … want this to happen _ever_ again.

Someone please … help me.

* * *

A silence hung in the air when Queen finished her last words in a whisper, clawing herself deeper and deeper in the blanket around her shoulders. Seven put it around her in the middle of the story, exchanging the cup of green tea for it.

She didn't know what to say. She could simply look at the miserable mess Queen was right now – tears were falling again, washing over her cheek in silent sobs.

It hurt in her heart to see her like this. No one should ever live through something like this. Now it was clear to her why she sought help in this distressed situation.

There was nothing to do for Seven except to offer her this.

"Queen …" She whispered, "Queen, come here."

Queen looked up when Seven put an arm around her shoulders and tucked her close, letting her fall against her shoulder in an embrace. Gently she rubbed with a thumb over the blanket, massaging her over her shoulder and arm.

If the words didn't come right now, this was the best she could do.

For a while Queen's sobbing sounded in the room, again piercing deep into Seven's heart, but in hopes her comfort made her feel better in any way right now. Her mind raced for anything she could say to her, she just had to say _something,_ she owed her at least that.

" … I'm glad you told me that, I'm proud of you." Seven began and swallowed, exhaling then deeply as she noticed Queen gave her the attention. "No wonder you felt like that, this is something which shouldn't have happened to you. … And from what you said, I … have a hard time to understand why it happened."

She paused for a bit, but then continued.

" … You told it happened after a mission, right? Then, maybe, what if you come over to me after each mission? Just in case if it should happen again. I'll be there for you and you're not alone. How does that sound?"

"Thank you, Seven." Queen mumbled against her, the last tears drying on her cheeks. "I appreciate your offer."

"No problem … Hey, rest up now, yes? You can sleep here if you want. I will be there the whole time." Seven shot her a smile and already made space for her to lie down. Queen complied and slid down Seven's shoulder, sighing at the comfortableness of the soft cushions on the bed.

 _So, I was right._ Seven thought while she watched Queen finding a good position to rest. _But why ..._

While she still couldn't figure out why this whole mess happened, offering to watch over her in critical situations might help. And who knew, maybe one day they can solve this crisis together.

They weren't called Big Sis and Class President for nothing.


End file.
